Lately I've been...

Reading: Currently reading The Nightingale by Kristin Hannah. WWII fascinates me. Such tough times, really gives you some perspective on how lucky we are nowadays. I'm hoping to start Catastrophic Happiness: Finding Joy in Childhood's Messy Years sometime very soon. I'm also interested in giving Hands Free Mama a whirl. Anything to help me soak up every ounce of joy in this chaotic season of my life. "These are the days..." and I know that I will look back on all of these unruly moments and miss them deeply. 

Wanting: A more organized routine. I'm a part-time critical care nurse, full-time mama. I work shift work, 12 hour blocks at a time. My schedule changes week to week. We don't have any childcare, other than ourselves. We make it work, but I am feeling as though my hubs and I are going through the motions of parenthood alone a lot of the time. We are practicing a "tag your it" kind of parenting and I envy those that can soak up every weekend together as a family. In fact, it's starting to look really damn good, but changing jobs is off the table, at least for now. Mostly, because I don't think I could personally handle the stress of a new job, but also, because I adore my work family so damn much, I can't imagine a shift without my people. 

Eating: Trader Joe's Mediterranean hummus paired with homemade pita chips. Trader Joe's is seriously the best place on earth. Also, their dried fruits. The sweet apple rings are the best snack this time of year.

Drinking: Let's be honest, the pumpkin spice latte is really all I want on these brisk mornings. #basic, yes! #ashamed, no! Oh, and some Sam Adams Octoberfest, it's a Fall classic.

Enjoying: 9pm. Both kids are asleep. and its either a show in bed with my man, or a drink out on the porch under the lights. After having the second babe, Alec sleep regressed and bedtime was an intense challenge. But now, Wes goes down by 7, and Alec has finally decided to stop putting up a fight. Some quality downtime before bed has been pretty glorious and much-needed. 

Wearing: Honestly, workout clothes. The funny part is that I don't work out that often, but I do chase after my boys all day long so I might at well be comfortable. And man, Gapfit is on point. Comfortable, cute, and inexpensive. You can't beat it. And now that the cooler weather has moved in, (thank heavens!), I am loving fall layers, cuffed jeans,  and ankle boots.

Listening: Pearl and the Beard and Shakey Graves. My friend, Christie, introduced to both bands while traveling around Hawaii together. I can't get enough.

Watching: The Night Of on HBO, Stranger Things on Netflix,  and This Is Us on NBC. I guess I'e been watching a lot of TV lately...

Wishing: Although I love Autumn much more than all the other seasons, I am looking forward to putting this Fall season behind us. Life has been a bit messy as of late, and I am dreading the upcoming weeks. Alec's open heart surgery is scheduled for October 19th. I can't wait to see what my boy will feel once he is fully recovered. Wishing for an even happier, healthier little dude. 


Capturing: Videos of my boys together (hubs and pup included). But seriously, these two little boys of mine are becoming best little buds and watching the two of them together makes my heart burst.

Lately...

Reading: Ha! Reading for leisure, I wish! I did just download Pretty Girls to my kindle and maybe someday I'll get a chance to dive into it. Any free moment I have is spent doing laundry or sleeping in this current stage of life.

Wanting: To exercise! Like really exercise. I can't wait to get medical clearance to hit the gym again. My follow-up appointment with my OB cannot come soon enough. I am done with this flabby figure of mine. I am ready to make some serious moves. I will, amongst the rest of the world, be hitting the gym hard in January (or so I plan to.)

Eating: Too much. I have never been hungrier in my life. Breastfeeding burns a ton of extra calories each day, but I can't really use that as a reason to justify my daily uncrustables indulgence. It's just the perfect quick and easy snack/meal, plus Smuckers really gets that peanut butter/jelly ratio just right. And the christmas cookies.. don't even get me started.

Drinking: COFFEE. A must. And I am consuming wine, far too much wine. It's the holiday season after all.

Enjoying: My babies. Alec is really starting to grasp this whole Christmas thing. He is such a little lover of lights. I mean the Christmas tree alone, has him completely mindblown. And Wes, I really don't need to explain. That newborn smell, those early morning snuggles... I am drinking it all in.

Wearing: Leggings. Loose, comfy cardis. Nursing tanks. Nothing exciting and I probably won't be until this body of mine figures things out. Plus everything I put on has to be nursing friendly. 

Listening: Old Christmas records I have accumulated over the years. Alec is a huge fan of Andy William's "Happy Holidays". 

Watching: Another big Ha! I try, but I just can't seem to keep my eyes open at the end of each day. These two little boys got me all tuckered out. I desperately want to finish up Homeland and The Leftovers. Hopefully, I will have this whole sleep thing figured out by April so I can watch Game of Thrones when it comes back on. 

Wishing: Everyone a happy, safe, and joyful holiday season spent amongst those you love. Cheesy, I know. 

Capturing: Every moment that I can capture of my two boys in one frame. Those precious moments are short and sweet and I never seem to have the camera ready, so many of the images I have are on my iPhone. I need to work on it, because I will want these images forever. 

Lately

Reading: I'm attempting to read Ship of Brides by Jojo Moyes… without success. I was a huge fan of her bestseller Me Before You. I haven't made it far into the book and I kind of refuse to give up, but there are two new books that have been on my radar for some time and I am eager to move one. Fates and Furies by Lauren Groff and A Window Opens by Elisabeth Egan.

Wanting: Please don't get me wrong, I love that I am pregnant. I love that I have been given the opportunity to become a mother again. I absolutely cannot wait to meet my baby boy... however, I am craving my pre-pregnancy self. Mostly, just my pre-baby body. It seems as though everything is starting to feel more challenging. Getting (more like rolling) out of bed to pee in the middle of the night (3 times a night), putting Alec in his car seat, and walks to the neighborhood park. It's all a bit more challenging and I look forward to moving around again with ease. Here's hoping the baby weight comes off quickly!

Eating: Apple cider donuts. That is all.

Drinking: Water, and the predictable (very #basic) pumpkin spice latte. 

Enjoying: This weather is perfection. My little man and I have been soaking up the outdoors as much as possible, in fact, being inside makes me feel guilty. Our days are full of fun adventures to orchards and parks, and our evenings are spent cruising the block with dad.

Wearing: I'm there… THERE, meaning that incredibly uncomfortable stage of pregnancy when all you want to do is wear a mu-mu or your husband's sweats, but it's not socially acceptable. The stage where you can't wear anything too loose or you look like a house, but you can't really wear anything too tight or you risk people throwing comments at you like "are you sure there's not two in there!?!". Attempting to remain somewhat stylish has become a challenge, but I have found that my staple go-to ensemble consists of a full-panel skinny jean, a simple tank, a drapey kimono/cardi of sorts, and my sam edelman booties. Toss on a scarf and/or some geometric jewels and there you have it.

Listening: Ryan Adams, 1989. What an interesting take on each of Taylor's hits. Perfect background music. And I'm into Coleman Hell's, Two Heads.

Watching: The Knick and The Leftovers and Homeland. We have a lot going on in the TV department these days.

Wishing: For a safe and healthy delivery. I feel like social media has me going crazy… I have come across so many heartbreaking stories lately about newborn loss and I am starting to develop some serious paranoia. Things have gone incredibly smooth this go-round and I pray, pray, pray it stays that way.  

Capturing: Oh, you know, the standard… photos of my boy…with pumpkins and multi-colored leaves… at the apple orchard… eating cider donuts. All things Fall.

Lately

Reading: I am currently reading Paper Towns by John Greene. It's one those books about life and adventure that you wish you would have read back in your teens. I loved The Fault In Our Stars so I figured I'd give this one a shot. I was looking for a quick and easy read and it has been just that. 

Wanting: Fall… I know, I know. But this heat just isn't for me, nor are the daily thunderstorms we've been having. I am also "wanting" a waistline… but all will just have to come in due time.

Eating: Carbs! I am currently dishing on the essentials. Ya know… peanut butter and jelly uncrustables, chocolate chip pancakes, and trader joe's vanilla almond granola with fresh berries. But I am getting worried that all of this carb-loading indulgence is going to come to a quick halt. At our last appointment, baby boy was weighing in at 1.5 lbs… over the 90th percentile for 22 weeks. SO, I am praying that gestational diabetes isn't the cause. With all that being said, I am starting to reel it in a bit and have been focusing my attention on a more well-balanced diet.

Drinking: I have been loving Target's Simply Balanced Sparkling Coconut Pineapple. It's the perfect alternative to soda and when everyone else is sipping on a margarita, I pour a bit of this over crushed ice in a wine glass and suddenly I feel like part of the party. The Peach Mango flavor is also delish.

Enjoying: This stage of pregnancy! The first trimester was a doozy, but heck, I just suddenly got this intense boost of energy over here and nesting is in full force at the Drake household. I've been sorting through bins, cleaning out cupboards and closets… mostly all in prep for the nursery. Things are coming along and I think we are going to paint the little babe's room over the weekend. Stay tuned, I foresee a nursery tour in the up and coming future. 

Wearing: Well folks, the bump is out, OUT! Seriously, there is no hiding this bad boy so I am workin it the best I can. I remember this being my favorite stage of pregnancy last go round and it's all coming back to me again this time. Your belly is still small enough that you want to showcase it a bit. I have definitely been rocking some more form-fitting attire these days, this dress and these jeans have been two of my faves. I absolutely love Anna's bump style from IHOD, and I have been channeling her as inspiration whenever I can. 

Listening: I guess Pancake Manor and Truck Tunes don't qualify as music, so to be honest, I haven't been listening too much lately. But I am really looking forward to the release of The Head and the Heart's New Album, whenever that may be. And I love just about anything by Ben Howard and/or Vance Joy.

Watching: Since Game of Thrones has finished up, we have moved on to True Detective, Season Two (Talk about an all-star ensemble cast!) And we are also looking forward to The Leftovers, coming back this Fall.

Wishing: For an Indian Summer. I don't necessarily want to wish Summer away, but at the same time, this heat and my pregnant body just aren't hitting it off too great. August of 2013 was splendid… I remember it being breezy and cool and looking back I had no idea how lucky I was. Give me mid-seventies to low-eighties and I will be the happiest mama bear there ever was.

Capturing: Lots of family photos by the sea.  And lots of videos of Alec. He is really broadening his vocabulary and hearing him use little phrases for the first time is just too cute. 

Lately

Whooaaa… it's been a while. Sorry for my lengthy absence. Life has gotten a little wild around here lately. Between many birthday celebrations, doctor appointments, and weekend trips to the beach.. I just haven't had much time to blog. And to be completely honest, I haven't really had the desire to. I've been wanting to unplug for quite some time… and that is exactly what I've been doing. I feel like, every now and again, it's important to avoid social media, put your phone down, and just be present in that very moment. It's nice to not worry about what everyone else is doing all the time… Just focusing on yourself is actually quite refreshing.

So now that I'm back online, I figure I'd share what I've had going on most recently with a lately post…

Reading: Still Alice. (Julianne Moore won Best Actress for her role in the adapted film.) I'm not sure how I feel about this book so far… I am pretty certain that by the time I am finished I will have convinced myself that I, also, have early-onset Alzheimer's disease. I can't imagine the fear one would experience knowing that you are slowly losing your mind, your cherished memories. So scary and absolutely devastating. After I finish up this book, I think I am going to opt for something a bit lighter.

Wanting: Spring… sunshine, sandals, an outdoor adventure or two. Sooo wanting Spring to just arrive already. This has been one lonnng, cold Winter and I am super over it.

Eating: I've been pretty lazy in the kitchen lately… we've been doing a decent amount of dining out, or a last minute Costco pizza thrown in the oven, but I am determined to get back into the swing of things. In fact, I think I will start with some slower cooker carnitas. I'll let you know how they turn out.

Drinking: Have you heard of the Olde Philadelphia Soda Company? I hadn't, until just recently. A co-worker of mine is marrying the CEO of the business and was telling me all about it... old-fashioned soda made with pure sugar cane. I cannot wait to get my hands on some of the cream and black cherry.

Enjoying: Naps. I attribute my lack of cooking, blogging, and picture snapping to naps. I normally get a lot done while Alec takes his nap in the afternoon, but lately, I have been putting him down and then climbing right into my own big bed for a snooze. I figure, might as well do it while I can, right?!

Wearing: Unfortunately, I am still rocking all my winter gear. It's still bitter cold in Delaware. I can't wait to be able to the leave the house without layering on a heavy coat, hat, and gloves. Although, I did purchase a few Spring pieces recently. I got this dress(in both colors) and these shorts for me, and I ordered this tee and these shorts for Alec.

Listening: Rozzi Crane. She's a singer-songwriter from San Fran and was the first artist to sign to Adam Levine's record label, 222 Records. Her voice gives me chills, and her new EP is solid. I hope she makes it big.

Watching: Giving House of Cards another go via Netflix and enjoying it this time around. (now that the creepy sex scenes between Kevin Spacey and Kate Mara have fizzled out, I think I can finally enjoy the show). We also just recently watched The Theory of Everything and it was pretty amazing. Eddie Redmayne and Felicity Jones killed it. They couldn't have cast two more perfect actors for the job.

Wishing: As already stated above... I am just wishing for warmer weather. I am also hoping, since life has settled down a bit, that I could maybe catch a little more 'me' time. Not a ton, just a simple pedicure, or an evening at the hair dresser. Mama is in dire need of some pampering!

Capturing: In addition to unplugging for a bit, I have also been the laziest picture snapper as well. My poor camera has been collecting dust and I am determined to break that bad boy out one of these days. I have some serious catching up to do on my 52 project.

Lately

Reading: I am currently in between books right now. I am struggling between a few solid recommendations. Wild, How to Talk to a Widower, & The Girl You Left Behind are all contenders. I have heard the movie, Wild, has gotten rave reviews so I will most likely start with that book first. Cheryl Strayed also had a hand in this book, which got 4.5 stars, so I might as well ad that to my must-read list as well.

Wanting:  Eye cream. Like a really nice, hydrating eye cream to help de-puff and smooth wrinkles fast. I am looking tired and ancient these days and I really gotta do something about it.

Eating: Smoothies! which I realize that this is an odd time of year to make smoothies regularly, but Alec has some molars coming in and an icy, cool beverage is just what the doctor ordered. This recipe is our go-to lately. Thank you, Pinterest.

Drinking: I'm going to be boring here… red wine mostly. A rich Malbec or Cabernet Sauvignon have been my go-to. I will admit I've been wanting to make one of these lately, but alcoholic drinks just haven't been much of a thing for us these days. (And no, I am NOT expecting).

Enjoying:  Surprisingly, we have been on the go since the holidays. I really thought things were going to slow down post-New Year's, but, boy, was I wrong. It's been a blast catching up with old friends and family. And the constant state of business has helped me to forget about the cold Winter weather; thus, enabling me to avoid any seasonal depression.

Wearing: Beanies, plaid scarves, & this toggle coat. Honestly, anything to keep warm!

Listening: I just went and saw Mo-town, The Musical at the Academy of Music in Philadelphia this past weekend. The show was pretty incredible and many of those classic tunes have been playing over and over in my head since. Vance Joy has also been playing on repeat in our house. 'Mess is mine' is definitely one of my favorites.

Watching: The Blacklist. We are halfway through the first season courtesy of Netflix and I must say, it's pretty amazing. James Spader (whom I've never really been a fan of) is nothing short of incredible.

Wishing: So badly, that we could put this procedure Alec needs to get behind us. (Siggghhh) Lots of restless nights these days. I know my boy will do just fine, but my nerves have got the best of me. I just feel so helpless. I desperately wish I could take his place in all this. But there is no doubt, this kid is braver than I'll ever be.

Capturing: Lots of videos of Alec. He is quite the performer these days, and not a moment can go unrecorded. I can't wait to show these captured memories to his future wife one day.

Past & Future

2014 was such a triumphant year for us. Things started out a bit rocky. In early January, Alec ended up in the emergency department at CHOP with fluid in the lungs, a minor complication from the open heart surgery he had in November. At the time, I feared little ED visits, such as that one, would become a regular thing for us. Little did I know, that we would make it through the rest of the year without one single hospital visit. Alec has surpassed my expectations. He has reached every milestone right on target and a few slightly ahead of the curve. He is such a bright, charismatic little fella and I feel so proud to be his mama each and every day. Every month gets more exciting, more fun and I can't wait to see what amazing things he learns to do in 2015.

Last Winter was a long one. We had an abundant amount of snow. Every time it felt like things were warming up a tad and an outdoor walk was in our future, we got another Winter beating. We lived with my parents from January to early May and I will admit I thoroughly enjoyed the company. But despite the help, those days were long, and sometimes just downright hard. Alec was still so little and with all the snow it was a challenge to get out the house. There was also little we could do when we did get out because of Alec's condition. The risk of exposing him to germs was just too high. Alas, we spent much of our time tucked away at my parents and we both went a bit stir crazy from time to time. Lots of tears on both ends. But once Spring had finally sprung, life got real good again. We moved into our new home and getting settled kept us very busy. Along with many household projects, we spent many of our warm days outdoors…lots of long walks, and fun-filled beach visits.

Come Fall, we had the heart walk and Alec's first birthday to keep us busy. Followed by the Halloween Sea Witch Festival, Thanksgiving, and Christmas. It was a good year overall, probably one of my best yet. I am so looking forward to what 2015 has in store for us.

Last January, I made a list of a five goals for the year. I did an okay job with one, two, and five, but I'll be the first to admit that fitness was not made a huge priority in 2014. Keeping active is very important to me, so I did manage to take long walks just about every day that the weather would allow The fresh air really did us some good. For the year 2015, I have decided on a few things that I want to focus on, nothing super crazy, just little things that I feel will improve my life a bit.

1. Say our prayers. I've been wanting to add this to our nighttime routine for some time and we officially broke out our bible of verses about a week ago. Prior to bedtime stories and his 'baba', I read aloud one verse from our bible and we name one person that we would like to pray for. I realize that Alec doesn't quite grasp it just yet, but I want him to grow to be a gracious, thoughtful individual and I definitely think a little prayer could help with that. Plus, I truly believe that prayer is one reason why Alec has thrived so well. He has been surrounded by so much love and so many prayers have been said for our little boy.
2. More Me Time. Attempt to do one thing for myself a week, whether it be exercise, a pedicure, a bubble bath, I honestly don't care. Just do a better job of taking a personal time out here and there.
3. Spend more quality time with those that I love. Not only do I think I could be more present at home with Alec and Kiel (put down the iPhone! walk away from the laptop!) but I also feel that I could do a better job of keeping in touch with many of my friends, some of which live a long distance away. This year I plan to work on all my relationships by being more present than ever. At least, that's my plan anyway.

That's all I got so far. Wish me luck. And good luck to you all on your own resolutions.

THE FUTURE IS SO INCREDIBLY EXCITING. THE WORLD IS YOURS.

Lately

Reading: I just finished "This Is Where I Leave You" written by Jonathan Tropper. A super enjoyable, easy read and also just recently made into a movie, starring Jason Bateman and Tina Fey. For me, I feel as though the characters were perfectly cast for the film. I can't want to rent it when it comes out on demand. 

Wanting:  I've been itching to get an essential oil diffuser for sometime now. Diffusing certain oils can help purify and cleanse the air of certain bacteria, mold, and pathogens. It can also impact mood, focus, and concentration while also reducing stress. Not to mention, they make your home smell spectacular. 

Eating: Our favorite Sunday Soup, a hearty tortellini and sausage recipe made in the crockpot. Super quick and easy. A family favorite. I've also been eating lots and lots of leftover Halloween candy. Sadly, we only got seven trick or treaters this year, and let's just say I planned for much more than that. Nevertheless, I am averaging a solid one to two reese's peanut butter cups a day and I am starting to feel it in the waistband of my jeans.

Drinking: Apple cider margaritas. I mean who can resist a brown sugar rimmed cocktail. And I've been enjoying myself a spiced chai latte every now and again. Such a perfect drink for a crisp fall day.

Enjoying:  Our budding social scene. The holidays always call for friendly gatherings and it has been fun to get to see everyone a bit more than usual. Recently, Kiel and I took a quick trip up to New York to see a few of our old college pals. It was an absolute blast, a weekend for the books. It felt good to be out on the town again. 

Wearing: ankle boots, cords, and chunky knit sweaters

Listening: Lately, I've bee listening to 'The Secret Life of Walter Mitty' Soundtrack. It's so relaxing, perfect background music. 

Watching: Kiel and I are trying to get back into Friday Night Lights. We've been working through the first season on Netflix for quite some time. It's such a great show about so much more than football. It really brings me back to the old high school days. Plus, that Tim Riggins is a real looker.

Wishing: That my little guy would rid himself of this lingering cold. Poor little babe has been coughing and snot-nosed for nearly two weeks. Fortunately, it hasn't gotten too bad, but I'd give anything for him to feel 100% again.

Capturing: This amazing stage that Alec is in. He is a total sponge, repeating every word you say. He is so incredibly animated, constantly attempting to wave down your attention so that he can join in the conversation. Lately, it has seemed as though he has an endless amount of energy. He is seriously running circles around me, so we have been visiting lots of nearby parks lately, where we climb, swing, and slide until his hearts content. 

Lately

Reading: I just finished Gone Girl. I know, I know, I am way behind. I have had it downloaded on my kindle for quite some time, but I had a few other books I had been meaning to read first. Let me just say, it was incredible. I honestly couldn't put it down. I finished it in under week, which for me, is unheard of. (Not much time to read when you have a little adventurer to run after). Now I can see the movie, which I also heard was incredible. Next, I think I'll be moving on to…"The Girl You Left Behind" by JoJo Moyes. She wrote "Me Before You" which was so so good. Or possibly "This Is Where I Leave You" which was recommended by a friend and recently made into a movie. 

Wanting: the "Petty" Bootie in black velvet, this checkered scarf, these leather striped leggings, & these amazing flannel pajamas. Seriously, the list could go on and on. I clearly want a lot of things. 

Eating: Milburn Orchard apple cider donuts & honey crisp apples, and lots of lots of chicken noodle soup from Costco

Drinking: spiked apple cider, malbec, lemon water, & salted caramel mocha lattes

Enjoying:  I have really been enjoying Alec's music class. We go to a montessori school once a week and we sing cheesy songs and dance super silly and Alec grins from ear to ear the entire time. The class is great for us because Alec gets some interaction with other kids his age. It allows him to socialize at a distance, which is really important, especially this time of year. Each child has their own set of instruments and nothing is shared so germs aren't spread like wildfire. I don't want to completely shelter my kid, but when you have a serious heart condition, a little cold to others can be really serious to us, so we have to be super careful.

Wearing: my newly purchased navy minnetonka slippers, and lots of flannel

Listening: "Shut up and dance" by Walk The Moon. One of my favorite bands currently. I am anxiously awaiting their new album. The single is so upbeat, even Alec can get into it. Also, "Take Me To Church" by Hozier. 

Watching: The Americans on FOX. We are behind, so we are watching on Netflix. It's a really interesting show, unlike anything else I have ever seen on TV. And I love Keri Russell, since the Felicity days. She reminds me of a good friend of mine.

Wishing: This beautiful weather sticks around for a while. Our Fall afternoons have been filled with long walks and park visits and we couldn't be happier to get out of the house and enjoy the outdoors before the long winter arrives. 

Capturing: Obviously, lots of pics and videos of Al. I don't want the poor kid feeling as though he has a camera in his face 24/7, but it's important to me to capture these precious moments because he is only this little for so long. And he is just the biggest ham. How can I resist.

"Oh, hey there."

 "Okay, I see what you're doing."

"Sure, sure, I'll give you a cheese."